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98 Comments | Category: Dating Tips-Inner
Do you want to know the EASIEST way to get girls?
A technique that requires NO THINKING?
If I were to boil my game down to one concept, one thing that has unlimited capacity to continue growing, one mindset that conquers all…
It’s extreme self love.
Narcissism at it’s finest, this attribute is LETHAL when interacting with women.
I could very well see, when I start releasing products that at least one of mine will center around this topic.
As I’m writing this right now, it’s hard for me to actually write out what this so called “self love” thing is, so I’ll riff for a while.
My assistants sometimes joke with me. If you read my articles, I focus pretty heavily on outer game techniques, yet in my own game, it’s almost completely internally focused.
But a lot of the mindsets I have cultivated are so internalized it’s hard to communicate them and teach them in a way that is effective. Especially when you only have a single weekend. You can only work so much on a “sense of entitlement” during a 3 day bootcamp.
So I haven’t had the time to flesh a lot of this stuff out. But I’ll try here…
It’s extreme narcissism, and it works great to keep your life fulfilled and for getting women as well.
It’s all I think about all day. If I’m drinking a water…
“Sweet! I’m drinking a water, no soda for me. God damn I’m going to be so money once I get a rockin six pack!”
Walking down the street…
“I’m just rolling down the street in downtown Chicago, heading to NYC in a few days, then off to Amsterdammmm. Damn I’m cool because I live in the coolest cities!”
Having ridiculous hair…
“I don’t give a shit about my hair. It’s so fucking money. Even when it’s all fucked up I look cooler cuz I don’t give a shit!!!”
I’m always thinking about how I am better looking than every other guy out there, how I’m smarter than any other person in the world, that I have a better life than anyone, that my vocabulary is better than anyone, that my fashion sense is the best…
It’s borderline insanity. But life is insane. 
—
I really have these thoughts constantly, and it builds me up. Pumps me up. Makes me feel happy at all times.
My life is almost completely stress free.
Now there are a couple of ways to cultivate this mindset.
1. It requires a very existential viewpoint.
- You need to realize that life has no meaning, it’s just a crazy story, and you can create whatever crazy story you want and be happy.
In Jed McKenna’s book, Spiritual Enlightenment the Damnedest Thing, he gives a good explanation of how to reach this existential viewpoint…
So I’ve created specific goals in my life, however those came about, who knows? Most likely social conditioning, partially just natural inclination.
But you can’t live by other people’s standards, you will never live up to them.
Create your own idiosyncratic standards that allow you to excel, to be the best, to be a “hero in your own mind.” 
So I create goals based off of my own value structures, and whenever I take an action that moves me towards these goals…
I feel good. Damn good.
Travel, health, women, financial freedom. Some I have pretty well handled, some I don’t, but ALL of them I’m working towards gaining a higher level of success.
Remember, you need to create life goals so that when you take action towards that goal, you feel good.
Let’s say you are working on those six pack abs.
Every time you grab a water instead of a Coca-cola, you should celebrate!
Get excited about the process, life is what happens when you are planning for the future.
2. Optimism
“…for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so” -Shakespeare
You need to realize that you can view any situation in a way that empowers your reality, or disempowers it. If your mindset is going to be “I am the shit. I am the coolest guy in the world.” Any disempowering thoughts need to be immediately extinguished.
A good book that elucidated this point clearly was:
Ask & It Is Given
These were the guys who were spotlighted in the movie The Secret. Although I think The Secret is cheesy, this book is great and gives you lots of hands on techniques for retraining your subconscious.
I don’t believe much in the philosophy behind it, the whole “we are all energy” type shit, but if you look beyond that, the book uses VERY powerful techniques for training your subconscious to only think positively and how this can manifest the things you desire in the real world.
From a success with girls standpoint, social dynamics is almost 100% a self fulfilling prophecy, so the more you can reinforce positive beliefs, the better chance you have of making them real.
Be cut throat on negativity. Do not even allow it to enter your thought processes.
Also, never talk in absolutes.
So if you are fat, it’s not that you are unhealthy. It’s “you are working towards becoming healthy.”
It’s not that you are negative, it’s “I’m getting more positive every day.”
———–
As you start viewing things this way, it takes a huge weight off your shoulders.
You are less stressed and just overall more happy and fulfilled.
This again creates a very attractive “vibe”.
It relates back to the old caveman times, what did the cavewoman look for in her ideal mate?
Well, the caveman that has his shit together, has the nice cave with fur rugs, plenty of meat in his little cave fridge… This caveman is probably pretty chill and at ease in the world.
He has no worries, and therefore strolls through life stress free.
He knows he’s the shit, and when he walks past a cavewoman, she can just feel that vibe.
I talk about this in the video here.
In today’s culture, it doesn’t take as much to get your “cave” stocked with food and some carpet.
You have everything, no need for expensive cars and all that.
It’s more about your MINDSET.
Don’t think that you need anything else.
You are enough.
Start actualizing and realizing this.
And life will become IMMENSELY easier.
98 Comments
Brad Branson
Every time you have a doubt come into your mind. Curtail immediately, and ask yourself, “Why am I awesome?”
Get it so that you ONLY think of why you are the shit, and cut it quick when weird shit that isn’t empowering bubbles up.
cameron
Learned a fantastic way of dealing with this at Toastmasters tonight.
NLP technique that is:
Visualize a parrot on your shoulder telling you all the negative shit, ie you can’t do that, you’re too much of a pussy etc etc.
Then take the parrot with both hands, one hand, a claw, whatever the hell you want
Chuck/Throw whatver the Parrot into a cage
THEN
Put a cover over the cage.
Hell throw it in river if you really must, but that excercise will work wonders if you make it a habit.
To help you do that, throw the parrot that tells you you can’t make it a habit in the cage, cover it and put THAT in the river 
Brad Branson
Haha, I HATE birds, so this works for me!
Blaine
Doesn’t that completely contradict the teachings of Eckhart Tolle, a teacher who you recommend strongly?
Brad Branson
I could see you interpret this exercise that way. For me, I view it as a way to reinforce positivity. Basically you become conscious of all your negative thoughts, and then decide not to dwell in them, or as Eckhart would say “Be the watcher.” Whereas Eckhart would probably say to just let them pass by, I think that is a good starting point, from there, reframe these situations in a way that reinforces what you want out of life. It’s take the eastern and mixing in some existentialism. Make sense? (actually I think this was just a bomb little thought here… haha)
Solo
Whenever I’m Sad, I Stop Being Sad and Just Be AWESome Instead!
Barney, True Story
Occam
Money Post $
Resaj
YES FINALLY
Although I cracked earlier, now it’s more conviction…
nice hair on the ass man haha
Brad Branson
I don’t think Jeff has ever seen my ass, so I don’t know where that came from.
Bob Jane
I don’t really understand what you mean by “Also, never talk in absolutes.” Could you please explain this a little further?
Cause I like to think that I’m fucking awesome and that makes me laugh haha. Do you mean I should be thinking I’m becoming more awesome? sounds pretty weak to me :/
Brad Branson
Good question. I guess this really more applies to negative things.
For people that have a negative thought, switch it into a positive that you are moving towards.
But, yeah you are right, for the positive it probably creates more power if you go absolute.
Like if you truly believe you are physically fit, be like “I am healthy!”
But if you aren’t be like “I am working to be healthy!”
Balwin Ratra
i remember in bootcamp u were telling us you saw a ferrari and you expressed thinking something along the lines “damn, that’s so cool. One day I am going to millionare and own my own ferrari. Sweeeet!” LOL but an extremely eye opening experience about the power of self esteem. Although one weekend is not enough to attain a rock solid sense of entitlement, you really laid out a very obtainable path by making the review discussions just as potent as field experiences. I am really grateful for the reality shifts you slammed into my core, and I know from meeting you that people should take the time to internalize the lessons of this article. Also I am a college student in debt, but if you can TAKE A BOOTCAMP WITH BRAD
Brad Branson
Balwin! That was a sweet program. Glad you are checking out the blog!
Pilgrimage2012
Its funny cause whenever I had thoughts like that I was thinking this is a bad thing cause I was “building a pimp image” that would fuck with my success with women.
You ever encountered this problem?
Anyway, having rolled with you for 3 weeks straight and seeing the magnetic effect on girls consistently on EVERY SINGLE NIGHT…
….I guess it’s time to fuck being humble and fully embrace being awesome instead.
subx
dont speak about how great you are. thats the key i think?
be narcassistic in your inner chatter ! but dont speak of it to other people?
Brad Branson
yep, I’m so fucking cool, I know even that I am the best CALIBRATOR as well. I know when to be humble, but on the inside, I’m all glow!
Dawidh
As long as it’s by your own internal standards and not by someone else’s I think it’s probably fine.
Brad Branson
Agreed.
markzor
it’s a problem when you displace your responsibility upon that pimp image.
like, when you just sit there, and think: “i am the pimp!”
and then moments later “why don’t the girls see that!”
and then in the end of the evening, crying: “i am so frustrated blwaaahhhh”
at all times you must realize your such a cool pimp because you take actions towards your life goals, and the good feeling and pimp image stems from you taking responsibility and action.
it’s wat alex said, take credit for succes, don’t identify with it.
and you combine this with “i am enough” a.k.a. everything i do i cool.
Brad Branson
Yes, you can’t ping off of your environment to validate this. You have to assume it, and CHANGE your perception of the environment so that it reinforces the mindset.
Calavera
Just a comment..
My buddy and I were laughing at this (he’s into this too) our thought processes are slowly turning into:
1.MAn i’m cooler then all these people
2. *awareness/disidentifcation.. lol, that’s a ridiculous thought my ego is retarded
3. BUT I’M STILL THE COOLEST.
Seems to be the way to go..
Calavera
Maciej
Amazing post!!
sean
awesome article.
raj
just wht i needed at this point of tym , thnx a lot =)
Hazard
Funny. This article perfectly explains how I think.
And I’m not even joking. It’s 100% my mindset on life. Live’s a joke, always be optimistic and “Fuck yeah I’m awesome”.
molan
great article man!
VidarM
Yeah!
This is actually became one of my favorites just now. Absolute self love.
So simple, so powerful and says so many right things to the the environment about you. Though I can see some ppl mistaking having self love for being selfish and vice versa.
You’ve just beaten ‘nation down their shoes in terms of quality articles, I do hope you get recognition for it.
Suggestion of topic; leverage. Why so many guys get into dating and so few follow through and become successful. What to do in order to prevent it and what to do if you’re key jockeying right now.
Self love ffs
Brad Branson
I’m glad you like it dude.
The leverage article is an interesting idea.
I highlight my rationale for why some guys push through and some don’t here in the wanna be a player? article.
Zach
I like the direction of your blog. Posting everyday takes energy and time – I dig it matey!
You have evolved so much since my last bootcamp with you (over a year!).
I’ll have to catch you on another program or World Summit next year. I’ll bring my A game though
Brad Branson
yep, it’s a constant evolution.
VD
Best post I have read in a while. Really thanks for the book recommendation, specially when it is about this topic.
Brad Branson
Sweet, yeah. I”m interested to here your take on the book.
VD
Yeah man, I’ll write a review sooner or later. Good stuff.
Tony
really insightful post man.. i really like re framing everything you dont yet have to “i’m working towards blah blah blah”
extreme narcissism is so fun too, my default answer now to most questions is pretty much “cause i’m fuckin awesome”
keep kickin ass brad : )
Dino
QUESTION: (Had to put this in caps since it might get lost in the many comments you’re getting these days – Love the blog)
Ok, so I just re-watched the last 2 DVD’s of the Blueprint where Tyler states: “Self esteem and happiness is a default state” i.e. you don’t need ego-based reasons for having self esteem.
Now I personally get a LOT of happiness from taking right action and improving my life all the time.
BUT how about this – Are you not still entitled to self esteem even if you’re drinking Coca Cola on a regular basis, because you’re basing it on your DEFAULT STATE.
So although being narcissistic because of all the great things we’re doing can be great, isn’t it in some sort of way ego-based “I do this, hence I am allowed to feel like this…” instead of feeling like that all the time.
Delusional vs. Rational narcissism?
Brad Branson
It’s a little bit of a semantical thing.
But as long as you make things under your control, you are the decider, then that is the big difference.
Who is to say drinking coke is good or bad, but if you interpret it in a way that you think it is good, and it makes you happy, then that is what this is espousing.
Eventhough, my health is a core value, so there would be a dissonance for me personaly.
As for your default state, that ‘s an interesting one.
What is your default state?
You could get into nature, nuture debates, but more than anything, it just comes back to your life experience and conditioning.
And realizing that is as an arbitrary experience as any other.
DDDDDD
That’s some awesome shit bro.
Reading the blog
i get the feeling
I’m the Movie Star
I’m the Shit
I’m THE MAN
Brad Branson
Welcome to my world.
Sean
Awesome article.
Doing this, I feel like I’m more just rehearsing lines in my head.
Do these things slowly just click into place and i believe what I’m saying at some later time?
Brad Branson
Yep, it takes a while, but it becomes autopilot after a while…
synergist
A product on narcissism or “extreme self love” would be perfect and awesome.
Brad Branson
I’m glad you say this!
This will be in one of my future products.
d'anconia
Yep, this is golden!
Connor
Another great article Brad!
I feel like this was the missing piece to my game. I actually went out and got Ask and it Is Given and it is like, LITERALLY, exactly what I needed to hear.
I had all the RSD “moves” down, (tonality, leading, physicality), but I knew something was missing. My mindset, or, this aspect was.
Thanks!
Brad Branson
Great, I wasn’t sure how that book would be received here, but I’m glad people like it.
Mindfuck
haha this is awesome man
thanks for the post, very informative
-cheers
Boire
This is one of the best articles I’ve ever read.
This one thing is key, it’s amazing.
If you ALWAYS think like that,
you will feel like that.
You will see NEG’s as compliments:
they try to make fun of the leader,
so that will say that you are the leader!
You also must try to wear funny or weird clothes,
the more people respond on it in a funny way in which they try to make a fool out of you,
the more you feel like a champ!
Brad Branson
Yeah, the funny thing is, a lot of times when guys interpret what she is saying as negative/NEG, it is actually her just trying to flirt with you.
So why not ALWAYS interpret it that way?!
Biere
is it possible to name a couple other affirmations you use?
So I get a better idea?
Brad Branson
The two affirmations/mindsets I teach on bootcamp are
1. I am the coolest dude in the world. (most high value, attractive, therefore assume attraction)
2. All women are nymphomaniacs. (they all want sex, everything they do is an indicator that they are DTF)
Book Review: Jed McKenna – Spiritual Enlightenment The Damnedest Thing | Brad Branson of Real Social Dynamics
[...] is where the whole extreme self-love philosophy I talk about comes [...]
Flash In The Pan: Learn How The Best Pull, And How Quickly It Disappears | Brad Branson of Real Social Dynamics
[...] the fact that after you go on a long run, you get a lot of good reference points reinforcing that extreme self love mindset, and it’s a pretty sweet positive feedback loop resulting in even more [...]
Jaser
Dude how do you explore your inner core on what you feel
good about doing/being? Like the ego structure… Because what if
maybe I have a unconscious thing going on where it’s externally
based maybe on looks and only the days when I look good I feel the
coolest? I want to find them out so I know what I want to get rid
of or make a blindspot How did you find out/recognize your
ego/value structures???
Brad Branson
You need to have it be something under your control.
Why do you feel you look cool one day and not the others?
Coolness, how good you look is opinion based, your opinion.
Why not reframe it, so that when you look like shit you are the coolest, why?
Because I can go out looking like it and still BOSS UP!
I’m so fucking cool, it doesn’t even matter what I wear and I can get girls!
-that should be your mentality.
King Dan
Life changing article. The first time I read this I thought it made sense, but the more I read this the more it “Clicks” in my mind. Whenever I was successful in the past, I had the “I’m the coolest guy in the world mindset” but I could never articulate into words the frame that you have.
I’ve also been recently interesting in spirituality, studying Ken Wilbur and James Miller, looking for a higher meaning. What makes you think that Jed Mckenna’s existential viewpoint is true?
Brad Branson
That’s sweet you are checking out Ken Wilbur’s stuff. I like him a lot.
I just like McKenna’s writing style, as for the overall philosophy, I go with… “Logically a nihilist, emotionally an existentialist.”
I don’t think you truly can live a nihilistic lifestyle as you would have no reason to keep living, but realizing there is no meaning, means you can create whichever meaning you would like.
And I know I have emotional anchors towards various things like money, security, comparing myself to others, and as long as I’m consciously taking action and realizing these things, I’m cool with that.
No need to go a step further into full blown nihilism.
King Dan
I just checked out some of McKenna’s stuff and it seems very nihilistic, which I think can be an unhealthy and destructive viewpoint for people who aren’t emotionally mature.
I resonate with your view on just “creating whatever meaning you like” out of life.
Brad Branson
I agree, McKenna’s stuff has screwed up a few people I have suggested his books to. Reader beware.
theCloser
Hey!
When you say that you are always thinking about how cooler you are than every other guy out there and you are better than anyone.
Is it a risk to become arrogant adopting this mindset and snub people? if yes, how not to do it?
Btw thanks for your answers, it helps me a lot
Brad Branson
Hey! The link for the book is at the end of every blog post either in your email or RSS reader.
If u aren’t getting the emails make sure you verified that you subscribed to the verification email google sends.
It may be in your spam filter…
Paul
Hey Bud, Question..
I am having trouble assimilating ‘I am cooler than everyone else’ with the Idea of not having to compare yourself to others.
I understand how assuming you are awesome works, but doesn’t assuming you are better than others create neediness?
i.e. you need others to be inferior to you, in order to validate this identity?
Cheers, Paul
Brad Branson
You are assuming you are better than others BASED ON YOUR OWN STANDARDS.
The other thing is to mostly view yourself based on your past self. Are you growing are you achieving, that sense of accomplishment is what motivates you…
Make sense?
Paul
Yeah, Ty bud,
although do you think it is neccessary to assumer that you are ‘better’ than others, Isn’t just thinking you are the shit, enough?
Brad Branson
Yep, the reason doesn’t matter, that’s why I like Tyler’s “Why am I awesome? Awesome!!!” It doesn’t make sense at all.
Any reason would be just delusional as any other, it’s whatever you need to feel like you are the shit.
Cooper, Dale
It’s all about giving yourself permission. It’s what this whole pick-up thing is about. The pick up trap is that instead of giving yourself permission to do what you want to do (pick-up and just life wise) RIGHT NOW you are constantly on the look for the newest techniques, more self-improvement books, it literally never stops. Reframing or knowing all your shit as being cool as fuck IS the end goal you are always on the look for, but instead of trying to reach that by constantly adding new stuff you reach it by reframing all that you have know / who you are now as being cool as fuck already. Hell of a lot less work and the only sane way to approach life.
Cooper, Dale
The trend just seems to first make it really fucking difficult for yourself before you get to that point where you just make it real easy instead. Maybe it is even necessary to walk that path first, maybe it is not, either way your gonna come to that realization sooner or later. Maybe this whole ´extreme self love´ is a shortcut so to bypass all of that.
Playboy
Love the stash, I don’t have one… And man you have HUGE cock. LOL
Brad Branson
I went full emo for a while with the mustache… It was glorious.
Derik
Right now my ego is telling me what is important to me is: success with girls, financial freedom, travel, health, learning something new often, (gaining more knowledge, usually about science, environment, philosophy, DIY), a pumped up rich-cribb, quit drinking, quit smoking, stop over-eating.
My question is: say I want to keep some of these as goals, and reward myself when taking action, but remove others, how do I retrain my subconscious into thinking something has value and something doesn’t? And how do I select entirely new goals that I want and train myself to be pleased with the steps I take?
For example I don’t want to care about my health or wealth so much. So how do I adjust my “automatic processes” to respond differently and stop caring about these? Is it by merely re-framing my thoughts that eventually turn into emotions? For example if a girl called me “ugly or fat” and I wasn’t effected by health, then I would be non-reactive yes and thus wouldn’t care. I guess it’s a matter of just re-framing thoughts positively over and over until it sinks in?
Right now I notice my processes are on “autopilot” meaning if a girl laughs at what I’m saying my body automatically feels better, how do I stop my body from doing this? I even sense the sense of self esteem rise the more she laughs. Thanks Brad!
Xander Kava
Waddup Brad,
First of all I want to say that this is a great post. I just wanted to touch upon one thing that relates back to Blueprint Decoded. I am assuming that you adhere to the principles discussed in that DVD series, but if not please let me know.
My question is how can someone have a strong, solid frame and be in beast mode thinking how awesome they are and that they could get any girl, yet not have an ego/not be attached to the outcome of the situation and be the guy who just kind of goes with the flow? I feel that the two sides are a bit contradictory, in that on one hand you have the guy engulfed in his own world while beasting and only doing whatever the fuck he wants, yet according to the principles Tyler talks about in Blueprint you need to destroy your egocentric base and just go with the flow. Yet you advocate “narcissism at it’s finest”, which in my opinion, is an egocentric mindset.
I feel there is a natural dichotomy between this unwavering, ego-based frame vs. a non-resistant, ego-removed player. In addition to this difference, how can you just let go and go with the flow, yet be in your own world and live soley by your own volition. Which is the correct mindset to approach situations with, or if I am missing the unity between these concepts, then how can you be both at the same time?!
Thanks again bruddah,
-X
Rick
Dude, it is just like being the yacht or teh gorilla. You do what you want to do without thinking of the consequences.YOU’RE SO POWERFUL,SEXY.CHARISMATIC,ETC that anyone who tries to get in your would be a joke.HAVE A HUGE SMUG ON YOUR FACE.
Rick
Plus like tyler said in the BLUEPRINT DECODED.See the child who wants the cookie,does he think about how cookie is gonna be,will anyone interfere,etc (NO) He just takes it out of pure intent.
Filipe
Actually, i think i all boils down to self love aka selfesteem. Just do this guys, and i would like to to hear an answer from you brad. Imagine your perfect women opening you at night on the street when you are with your friends, just so that you can imagine! I bet she would be well dressed, make-up, beautiful hair, nice clothing, confident walk, nice smile. Then she would talk to you with, she would say something funny with a sexy vooice, she would flirt, she would be non-reactive if you said something that came out wrong, she was just living the moment and being happy. Now, can you imagine her possessing any of the ones above without having extreme love for her self??!! Guess what! Now imagine what kind of guy would they be dreaming of i you asked them (women) the same question. I bet there would be a lot of similiarities! Learn to love yourselfs 1st!
- Filipe, Portugal
Mike
Hey Brad,
Fantastic article. After I read it, I felt really good for a few days – but then suddenly I’ve hit a stump again. I’ve suffered from enormous insecurity my whole life relating to my looks. I’ve always just felt incredibly ugly, and even when I’m trying to re-program my mind, the fact is, as far as I’m concerned, I’m ugly, and aint nobody telling me otherwise, so it’s really hard to start thinking “I am the shit, I am the shit” when I get reminded of how ugly I am every time I look in the mirror.
Do you have any tips? i really need your help
Andras
“It’s extreme narcissism, and it works great to keep your life fulfilled and for getting women as well.”
I’m sure you know that a clinical psychologist would get a kick out of that one. I think extreme narcissism, deep-seated cynicism and practical existentialism (these are all intimately tied together) work great during night game, but are hollow and useless when trying to live a more mature life at the end of the day: long-term relationships, deep friendships, spiritual growth, work-life balance, that kind of a thing.
Anyway, I’m thankful for your blog (I subscribed), coz it made me realize that I’m no pooah YET, but an intermediate dabbler who’s good with 7′s and some 8′s. You sir are the PUA, and I’ll work hard on advancing to your level… without the existential/nihilistic framework, which I think sucks ass as an outlook.
Brad Branson
Haha, those are all kind of loaded words. If you were to meet me, or watch the recent video I just posted, you’ll see that even though I speak in extremes, I’m not espousing to be some crazy oblivious arrogant dick.
Most guys are so far on the other end, that if they even make it 10% they’ll be way better off.
Also, I’d say ultimately it’s just self esteem, building up your own view of yourself, feeling worthy and happy about your own existence. However it takes to get there, I’m just trying to say it in as many differnet ways as possible so it finally clicks for someone.
Thanks for subscribing man, and your participation in the discussions!
venusianspitfire
Hey Brad,
I’ve been going at this extreme self love for for a while now…and it seems like the only common thread between my lays… ie somehow im able to get into an entitled mindset while simultaneously blocking anything to do with reality/external reality outside my entitled mindset…
But getting here has happened in different ways…
1) Focusing on my thoughts and keeping them high value to the point where I feel literally awesome and like the biggest pimp ever … kinda like you mentioned in keeping the jersey guido mindset ..
2) Through focusing/being conscious of my non reaction seeking behaviours/ breaking tonality almost sounding harsh but with complete control and a smile (kind of) kinda like you mentioned in your 21 convention video at around 43 minutes in…. Like I’ve even got to a point where I’m instantly able to recognize non coldness (if it even happens by mistake, as it hardly happens in this conscious state) and cut myself midway even before it happens or in less than a second
Would love to get your views on which way to go about this 1) or 2) and bounce my ideas of what I’ve experienced in both modes…
In 1) – keeping high value thoughts throughout…This is so dope and logical from an evolutionary stand point while 2) is exactly like you mentioned a cheat code..which I love as well in games.. and finally life is an awesome game that we all get to play and level up
Successfully having 1) – (high value thoughts consciously to the point where they become semi unconscious – you just know by say 2 weeks of this) causes all the high value behaviours to flow, sometimes when I feel a test kinda situation from the girl, I consciously keep high value thoughts and this works kickass.and I can pinpoint anytime that I haven’t done well to a non high value thought – causing neediness in my actions …. So like I said…this is logical to me and seems like something that has unlimited capacity to grow…! and seems like I just have to trust the process and go with maintaining high value thoughts/entitlement as consciously as I can…
2 – (conscious of non reactive behaviour/tonality/body language/ cold vibe base + express from here)
This is a different ball game which I’ve only just started alternating with 1) sometimes and seems to work pretty well when its able to get my thoughts into entitlement …. for example… when I’m being conscious of my actions/ reactiveness/cold vibe base etc…its almost like I know perfectly how much to give myself to the set…how cold to be depending on reactions etc as well..its awsesome… and when I’ve been like this..sometimes I step back and see..ok my thoughts/ feeling feels like I’m the boss here.which is 1).. and it works…sometimes when I’m being needy its easier to spot using this “cheat code of consciousness” instead of forcing high value thoughts when I feel a dissonance (frame battle)
In conclusion 1) seems to lead to 2) and 2) when successful does seem to always have 1) … so which way is best to go about it… I’m alternating this stuff at the moment and would love your feedback on this
So, hope you enjoyed this detailed post!… just seems like forever that I’ve been typing it.. just been mulling all this stuff over and its scary and beautiful how things flow logically once you get to a required level of depth in understanding this stuff… time for a J now .. and again Thanks a ton for your 21 conv video again!
rohan
brad…..thanx a lot….. m gonaa change my lifestyle….. n thats gonaa change d world fr me
Andras
Brad, I have a question: how do I handle a quiet 8 who I only meet in a weekly youth group? She looks great but seems introverted and unresponsive; she rushes straight home once these youth group sessions close at 9PM. There’s only like a 3 min window every week before sessions to chat her up, because there’s no socializing during sessions. How does a PUA handle that? Thanks.
Jorgw
Awesome article. I recently learned about the law of attraction and am realizing how it ties into everything, especially positive mind sets and RSD philosophy. It’s like every succesful person alludes to it but nobody realizes it. I think it’d be great if you write about that a little bit more.
Vesper
Wonderful article Brad!
I now found the right words to say to others every time I am asked, why do I love myself so much!
Or why I’m too proud of myself and the like.
You really ROCK Brad! 
Arnie
Hi Brad,
Fell in love with your blog..!
Your posts on the theme of self love struck a cord with me. Tried this exercise tonight: got out a notebook and a pen and started writing reasons ‘why I am awesome..’. Shit man, that’s hard. Writing down some stuff of which I think – yeah, that IS pretty awesome. But then there are also negative thoughts and doubts coming up – it SHOULD have been such and so.
Am just persevering with the exercise, just to train my mind. Trying to blast through those negative thoughts. Any tips?
Cheers!
Brad Branson
Sweet! Nice to have you here. It really gets easier with time. It takes conscious decision at first to only focus on the positive, but in time, if you train yourself, it will become autopilot. Cheers!!!
Alex
Just would like to say I enjoy all of your articles, I’m somewhat new to the site but when I started reading this one I honestly felt as if I wrote it, I have the same mindset and it really does make life fucking great. Everything about it.
Brad Branson
Thanks Alex! Glad you enjoyed it.
Tom
I just wanted to say this article has had a very drastic and AWESOME effect on me. All your articles on mindset and inner game are absolute money.
Tig
Thank you for this post my dear Bradley
This article was the second rock at pushing over the coke machine (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bTi9eJqkxng) in terms of negativity for me. I’ve had a big epiphany of negativity’s destructiveness and positivity’s awesomeness in the past – might’ve started from the blueprint actually but i’m not too sure. But this was the second epiphany. I’m gunna re-read Awaken the Giant Within and keep anhillating negativity and overlapping it with positivitiy.
Hash
Legendary article. I come back to it all the time.
Hash.
Brad Branson
This is one of my favorites too. Thanks for the comment
rodrigo
hey brad,will developing this mindset work if your a hardcase newbie?i mean im already working on myself and, gotten some helpfull reference experiences to back up some of those positive belifs that i want to have.for example going,”yeahhh im the shit,ima hardcase and so what! im still here getting ready to appraoch some hoochies,girls like my awkwardness?” pretty weird but yeah.
Brad Branson
Yes. Keep reinforcing it. Owen released a couple videos directed to the hard case noobie. You check those out?
rodrigo
yeup.i watched all of them.thats how i started getting some helpful reference expirirences.being happy with 9 second conversations and then sometimes going longer than that,like 5 mintues,one time even 10 minutes!as i was reading this,i thought this would work only for “normal” guys,but now that you confirmed it,im going to read this post everyday and apply it on everything i do. for a mintue i thougtht i was going to mess myself even more by trying to develop E.S.L.haha.Thanks Brad!
Brad Branson
Hah sweet! Glad it helped so much.
Iggy
Ey, it´s Iggy. Brad, this concept of extreme self love is the shit.. I´ve always been so self loved but I always tried to control it but when I first read your stuff I just let it go hahah (thank god). Now Im so fcking narcissistic, in the good way (taking advantage on that). Thats why I´m saving money for a bootcamp with you buddy… I wanna master this concept as far as I focus pretty much all my game around this. But meanwhile I would appreciate you to tell me some good books where I can learn more about that tho. Eyy! You also know my good friend Jim from NY huh (he´s in tokyo now).
You! keep posting this gold! Awesome!
Much love from Spain
-Iggy
Domigo
Hey Branson, I really liked your article and please excuse me for my poor English.I recently finished with power of now (popularly called as new age hippie shit). But aren’t you identifying things with yourself? Isn’t this thing helping in development of the ego? You are contradicting your article with tolle. For example,
“I’m just rolling down the street in downtown Chicago, heading to NYC in a few days, then off to Amsterdammmm. Damn I’m cool because I live in the coolest cities!”
Aren’t you identifying yourself with cities ? Isn’t that developing your ego? Once you are in a small town you will loose your self esteem! I am little confused.
knoxville
I love this article and have continued to read it over the past couple years. Brad, I look forward to you releasing new videos and articles on this subject. Its seriously been life changing for me. In a way I get to practice “game” even when I am not “gaming.” Its helped me get rid of all those negative bullshit thoughts that I have through out the day. Thanks man!
Roviera
Thanks man! you just got me out of a really really depressed ass vibe that has been
haunting me recently! I’m the man now!
About Brad
Brad Branson has been an international dating coach with the leading dating company Real Social Dynamics for 3 years.
Through his own success and teaching experience, he has taught HUNDREDS of men how to create the dating life they desire.
He’s coached in over 35 countries on 4 continents, developing universal patterns that ANYONE can apply, no matter what city, age or income bracket they come from.
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Oh shit, thanks!
Whole new perspective. You just helped me realize you gotta exaggerate the shit out of it all in order to shake the current structure down right?