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The 35 Laws of Subtle Attraction (Be the Gorilla)
The linchpin of my teaching methodology is Attraction = Value. My goal on program...
The 35 Laws of Subtle Attraction (Be the Gorilla)
77 Comments | Category: Dating Tips-Inner
The linchpin of my teaching methodology is Attraction = Value.
My goal on program is to help the client understand this on a very deep level, and then learn easy ways to convey as much value as possible.
One of my most popular articles on RSDNation back in the day was the cheat codes article because it highlighted 3 of the most high leverage techniques for conveying value and building attraction quickly.
I also off-handedly mentioned that there were probably 30 different ways to convey high value, which resulted in me receiving dozens of emails asking what the other techniques were, even with people offering me financial remuneration.
Last weekend I was teaching program in Boston, and I was explaining that when you approach a girl directly, with strong intent and focus, most of these high value modalities (35 laws of subtle attraction) are byproducts of the approach.
The problem is that they are incredibly subtle.
The way I explain “alpha-ness” is by using the 2 examples of an alpha wolf and a silverback gorilla.
You see, both are alpha, yet one defines my game, while the other, is incredibly try hard.
The alpha wolf needs to convey his alpha-ness through growling and looking mean. It is energy intensive, there is no assumption.
While the silverback gorilla just chills back, squatting at the top of the mountain with his harem, making his ladies feed him grapes and shit.
It’s fully assumed that he’s the man.
Yet if something goes down, some foreign male intruder enters his territory, or some other danger arises, he’s prepared to step up, usually only requiring a lifting of his chin and iceberg laser eyes, and the threat is quickly extinguished.
That’s the type of high value traits I rely on, subtle assumption.
This is hard for many guys to grasp, because it’s beneath the surface and requires a great deal of self trust.
Each modality of subtle high value may only increase your overall attractiveness by 1%.
1% here, 1% there, it adds up, leading to incredibly high levels of attractive, high value, alpha manliness interweaved together into an unwavering, titanium core confidence.
Sounds pretty cool, doesn’t it?
So without further ado, here are 35 ways to convey subtle high value/attraction:
1. Non-submissive eye contact
-no darting of the eyes when you look at her, no breaking eye contact first.
2. Vocal Projection
-the loudest guy in a group is usually the most comfortable, unstifled, and highest value.
3. Commanding and Challenging (Breaking Rapport) Tonality
-commanding authoritative tonality puts you in the same category as other high value people.
-it also gets her to respond in a qualifying tonality, which results in her subconsciously rationalizing that she must like you because she only qualifies herself to high value people.
4. Unreactivity
-not socially pinging off of the girl. Your state is not dependent on her reaction to you. Be the yacht.
5. Who’s reacting to who more
-who’s laughing quicker at the other’s jokes, who’s more into the conversation, who’s giving subtle indicators that they like the other? The one reacting more is lower value, similar to…
6. Who’s more in their head, who’s not
-this is the internal reasoning behind #5. One way to create this is by vomiting words, which results in her trying to piece together the conversation. The more non sequitar, the more she is in her head trying to understand what you are saying, this is why it is so important to…
7. Lead the conversation
-you have control of what is being said. I call it channeling the river, steering the conversation in the direction that moves the interaction forward as opposed to just being a little bitch and talking about whatever just so you can keep the conversation alive.
8. Good body language
-when you feel comfortable and confident you are naturally going to take up more space and have good body language, for similar reasons it is important to have a larger…
9. Physical presence
-guys that are alpha just take up more space. In a group usually the most alpha guy might have 2-3 feet of space between him and the next guy, whereas the more stifled insecure person takes up very little space. This is also noticeable in how much physical movement you use, hand gestures and ease of movement in general.
10. Bringing your state from within
-similar to #4 and #5, you aren’t relying on anyone or the environment to pump your emotional state, you feel good because of your own awesomeness, and the law of state transfer makes everyone happy around you as well. This relates to…
11. Self amusement
-the opposite of self amusement is reaction seeking. Reaction seeking is neediness and a low value trait. Self amusement is purely for your own enjoyment because you don’t care about anyone else and just bathe in your own awesomeness. You do not seek reactions to make yourself feel good.
12. Stating your opinion
-a high value person is more likely to state their opinion, purely because it comes from them, as opposed to a low value person who doesn’t think anyone cares what they have to say.
13. Statements not questions
-statements are always more authoritative than questions, and who knows, you might give a cold read that is accurate. You tell her she looks like a nurse and she is, and she’ll think it’s fate that you two met.
14. Lowering the bar for what you talk about
-pick up lines are not important. The more bullshit things you say, the more it conveys that you don’t care about the interaction, or the girl’s response to what you say. It shows that you talk to girls like her all the time, or probably have a couple on speed dial.
15. Conveying intent
-by showing that you aren’t afraid to convey that you like her, she’ll see that you are willing to be vulnerable and put your personality on the line, something only someone with high self esteem would feel comfortable doing.
16. Commanding attention
-don’t compromise your value just to keep her talking. If she isn’t looking at you, call her out. If she is on her phone, call her out. A high value person assumes that when he is talking, people listen. If there is a dissonance, he takes action.
17. Being as comfortable, or more comfortable than the girl
-no leaning in to hear her, no standing while she is sitting. Get comfortable, relax, she should be excited to talk to someone as cool as you, not the other way around.
18. Entitlement
-you feel entitled to the girl. You fully assume that she is yours, and you are not emotionally affected by any response she has towards you either positive or negative. The byproduct of this is…
19. Indifference
-again, you are emotionally indifferent to her reactions towards you This conveys a level of abundance in the fact that you probably have other girls, so she doesn’t have as much value to you.
20. Lack of outcome dependence
-18 and 19 explain why you have no emotional reaction to anything she says, and this has inherent social proof/value.
21. Authentic conversation
-I talked about this last week in the spectrum of authenticity article. The more authentic and real you are, the more vulnerable you are and the more balls it takes.
22. Full frontal positioning
-none of that old skool bullshit about body rocking and over the shoulder openers. Go in direct, straight in there, face to face, and make yourself vulnerable.
23. Passing shit/congruence tests
-Alex used to say that 80% of “natural” game is passing congruence tests, and every time you pass a test, attraction goes up.
-remember congruence tests are more than the obvious “Is that your pickup line?!” There are also the more subtle ones like not making good eye contact, staring at her phone, or initial unreceptivity at the beginning of an interaction. The best way to respond is by…
24. Being unapologetic
-when you go through life by your own standards, you don’t try to please people, you just tell it like it is. Some girl gives you shit, you call her out. People don’t listen, you tell them to pay attention. This is because you…
25. Don’t identify yourself based on other people’s opinions
-do you see how these are byproducts of each other, somewhat overlapping? This is why it is all so powerful, it creates a web of beliefs, a rigid unwavering belief system.
26. Escalation
-more leading here. Having that detachment from the outcome to the point where you aren’t emotionally affected if you go to escalate and don’t get it. Another way of saying this is to cultivate an…
27. Abundance mindset
-What if you don’t have abundance? Guys always ask how they can have an abundance mindset if they obviously aren’t doing very well in the success with women category.
-but it’s not abundance directly with women, it’s abundance in the fact that you have trust in your skillset to get another girl if it doesn’t work out with the one in front of you.
28. Congruence
-who’s frame is stronger, yours or hers?
-whoever holds the frame unwaveringly wins, and is more congruent in how they act, knows themselves better, and trusts their own judgment over others.
29. Being non-judgemental
-being judgmental of her sluttiness, or ANY sort of judgment, is a sign of naivety and of someone who hasn’t seen much of the world or experienced life. This is why travel is a great way to develop a stronger frame. Life experience makes you much more…
30. Comfortable in your own skin
-this is also why as you get older, as long as you are working on yourself, you only get more attractive. You’ve experienced more in life, and when something you don’t expect happens in the interaction, you deal with it accordingly, without anxiety, without stress.
31. Walking through the world with ease
-someone that has his shit together isn’t going to be stressed. Betas are stressed in life, worried about surviving and pissed they aren’t the alpha, while the alpha gorilla just chills back and lives the good life.
32. Standing out, be unique
-society conditions us to be average, to be beta. Throw away the stripey shirts, throw away the khakis, get a little sex appeal.
33. Being comfortable with silence
-not feeling like you need to keep talking if you have nothing to say, you are just as cool chilling with your own awesomeness. When the conversation stops for a moment, it gives you an opportunity to remember how cool you are.
33. Dominance
-what is dominance? The opposite is submission, and therefore proactively leading the interaction leads to her submitting, one way that you can show that you aren’t afraid to take a risk is by…
34. Leading
-to lead is to take a risk, if you go for it, let’s say moving her to the bar, you might not get it, and a low value person, someone not comfortable with themselves, would be afraid to try.
35. Assuming attraction
-there is inherent social proof based in how you interact with the girl. If you are interacting with her in a way that you are assuming she likes you, she will deduce that other girls that look like her usually like you as well.
Action Plan
So how do you use this list?
You don’t want to try and micromanage all of these things.
The goal is to just understand that being high value creates attraction through all these different channels and manifestations of your mindset.
Therefore you don’t have to worry about doing anything SPECIAL. Stop worrying about being more attractive, creating attraction.
Keep working on YOURSELF.
If I could boil it down to one thing, it would be getting more comfortable in your own skin.
As I said before it’s a subtle game.
Don’t think Tommy Lee, think Tony Williams.
Be the jazz drummer.
Fuck yeah, check out Tony Williams at the 1:00 minute mark. No superfluous motion, efficiency in action, ease, technical proficiency, compared to ridiculous Tommy Lee ostentation.
Be the gorilla.
EDIT: One of my former students created this awesome infographic giving a summary of this post.
Check it out! As well as his website at http://www.createvisualimpact.com
77 Comments
Brad Branson
The extreme self love post is my view on getting there the quickest. Create reference points where you are the highest value person, and start reinforcing the belief.
Gorilla
And i have to say this is great reference. Thanks brah!
Brad Branson
Haha, sure thing Gorilla…
GaryBusey
Confidence = willingness to feel vulnerable.
Brad Branson
Yeah, I agree.
I usually say confidence comes from “your ability to accurately predict the future.”
The more times you see the sun come up, the more confidence you have that it will happen tomorrow.
So the more reference points you get, the more confidence you have in the event.
Calavera
Brad- LOVE this shit.. could you give a list of Beliefs that would LEAD to these naturally? I would love that!
Calavera
Calavera
Here is what I gather: Don’t try to BE alpha.. you already ARE alpha. (or a gorilla in this case..)
Self-acceptance. “Here I am, I can do no other”
Brad Branson
The extreme self love post goes into that in detail. Unless I am misconstruing your question…
Calavera
What affirmations would lead to this naturally? (Minus extreme self love)
On that note, do you even think affirmations are useful?
I imagine it would be affirmations, but getting references to affirm the affirmations..
Brad Branson
The only mindset I teach is Assume attraction/Be high value/you are the coolest dude in the world. All one and the same.
Then it just comes down to reference points to solidify it.
Do I believe in affirmations? Yes, I guess.
But they aren’t very strong, I think any type of mental thinking is going to condition your sub conscious, but the level of emotional attachment to something is important as well.
You may say that you deserve a 10, but there is no emotional significance behind that statement, but if your last girlfriend was one, there is a lot more emotional attachments involved.
This is why some self help gurus suggest you to put your hand on your heart and yell when you speak the affirmations, calling them incantations instead.
This supposedly makes them work better because it is a more visceral experience…
Polarize
On Number 16. What are some examples you can give on how to call out a girl?
Brad Branson
“Ay! You have bad eye contact!”
“Blah blah blah… Text messaging is boooorrinnnngg! Look at me when I’m talking to you brat.”
“Hey! I’m trying to flirt with you. Be cool!”
Pilgrimage2012
SWEET. it’s all summed up in
BE THE GORILLA.
huge click first time i heard it on one of your bootcamps. and IMO it’s crazy how much the gorilla analogy actually applies to yourself/the way you carry yourself.
ps the drummer comparison is hilarious.
pps consistent quality shit!
Brad Branson
Oh yeah, I’m the man. And I gotta credit Matt for the analogy.
Chris
pretty cool how you transfer your knowledge 
Brad Branson
thanks. Years of teaching I guess.
metta
Amazing article!
Drama
Perfect post man.
Brad Branson
Thanks dude. I love your gravatar!
Aaron A
Awesome post Brad. I could easily see this post and the Extreme Self-Love post being timeless and continuing to be the relevant foundation for success with women years from now.
Brad Branson
I hope so, it is my “manifesto.” at the moment.
I’m sure things will evolve even further, but right now, this is the lynchpin of what I teach.
Diego
The list of glory.
Actually they were the 36 laws of pimpingness
The principles behind those traits are the things that enables you to behave like that and they are synergic: like having “extreme self love” will make you easier to “enjoy life” and to achieve “the indifference threshold” and to “accept imperfection” in your game so you just focus on get things “done” by “taking responsibility”
very very cool stuff
Brad Branson
Yep, I agree. Of GLORY!!!!
Maikuljay
Makes sense.. No need to be aggressive when you already have everything you want
Brad Branson
Yep, assumption is easier said than done though…
scott
Similar to Tyler’as old school 25 points post. While focusing on every number is a bad idea. If you work on one point over time and internalize them, you have built a solid foundation. You are attractive. You work this shit out day by day. Go out and practice deliberately, hammer out all these points and in a few years your shit is taken care of. You become the gorilla, laid back and chiil No need for flashy teeth or magic tricks.
scott
Sweet hat in the picture. Enjoying your own style. Love it.
Brad Branson
Haha, yep, some dude in a bar had it on and I bought it from him.
Adil
Great article with smooth transition from one law to another.
some random thoughts:
- No neediness to show pics of hot babes scored to other people. Girls can sense this authentic and fair treatment somehow and can trust you more.
- No neediness to show a six-pack no matter how cool it is. Feeling that you have it and not demonstating to other people is awesome.
- Whispering in her ear smth sexy yet knowing that the next second you can yell smth stupid and hilarious is awesome. You may or may not yell, depends on the vibe. You feel that capacity in your voice to BLAAAAAAAAAH!!!
- Feeling awesome when after opening, flirting with and escalating chicks, you hand them babes horny to your friends. hm… and taking them back if friends cannot capitalise and if you want:) Entitlement and abundance
- Not talking about girls when you are with your friends, enjoy your company and have empathy. Be humble. They will know your faculties once you get girls into your company and will respect you even more for being humble about it.
These are the those things I demonstrated in the past to show I am an alpha wolf (try-hard) and thanks to RSD and practice in the field I’ve overcome some and learned some traits of the Gorilla:)
Brad, what pitfalls did you have when you were trying to be an alpha wolf in the past?
Brad Branson
I actually never went through the alpha wolf phase too much. I don’t think it’s an evolution.
For some it is, but some get the idea right away.
More than anything, if, after reading this you feel like you are more of the wolf mentality, to shift your focus towards a more presumptive style as opposed to thinking you need to outwardly convey it.
robbie
excellent stuff brad – thanks for breaking it down. the flow is very real between each point and interesting to realize. tommy lee vid hirarious mang.
Brad Branson
Haha, yeah full 80s ostentation.
Thanks for reading!
Two Step
I read this and I very much enjoyed it…. I couldn’t really put my finger on these two types of “alpha” but well… you did…sweet tits
Love the blog
VD
I have been waiting for this article since the cheat codes one. Not that I’m not 100% familiar with all these concepts, but just the fact of having them together from a 6 nights a week out of the house guy and not some random KJ on the board makes them special.
You should totally put them on a Mastermind yo!
Brad Branson
Haha, that’s funny that you remembered, I also remember you being one of the adamant ones, like “I shouldn’t have to take a bootcamp to get these points!”
The Legend of JT
Brad,
This is print-out and post to a wall worthy…great job!
Brad Branson
Gotta add this video, The Duck recommended it on RSDNation.
PERFECT example of how the gorilla should swagger. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDxA8-01cp4&feature=player_embedded
El Fiasco
This is one of the best articles yet.
Brad Branson
Thanks, I like it as well. 
Roark101
Great, great list, Brad. Great advice for girls and life. Be seeing you soon in Miami.
Brad Branson
Oh yes, Miami Model Season Bootcamp baby!!!
jib
Brad ,
where can i find material on “crotching tiger “.
cheers
Brad Branson
Haha, there is none. It’s basically, POST-makeout, when you know the girl is down, you pin her up against the wall and LITERALLY lift her off the ground by placing your knee between her legs.
Not for the faint of heart, but it physically turns her on, and shows her you mean business.
Again, I only do this once I already know it’s on, and I’m preparing to pull her out of the club.
adam
Yo brad, thanks for the info on this site man. I recently got into pick through a friend of mine and although I’ve had relative success with women, I think it was part luck and part caveman, unpollished skill. This weekend past I through myself into my first set and it went pretty decent. She offered to buy me a drink and I led her to the bar, fluff talk, hug (during the first minute at the bar) into you can be my gf for the next five minutes, I whipped out the claw in all of its radiant glory but then she left not too soon after that. Its the first time I opened a set in a bar and even though I didn’t close I’m content about over-coming my approach anxiety. Knowing all theory is useless without the practical. I’m. Looking forward to the next post. Peace out
Brad Branson
Nice, yep, they always say you learn more from one rejection than 100 hours of reading… You’re lucky you came here! You’ll get a good solid foundational understanding.
SaintPatrick
Brad, I know this is completely unrelated to the article, but can you tell me about what skills you pursue? Through your articles I’ve been for the past years thinking “all this guy does is pickup”.
And now I see you write about guitar, PPC and domains, and some activities I also do, and I think you could have pretty solid stuff to convey. You seem much more knowledgeable than you convey at first impression.
Brad Branson
Yeah, it’s mostly from trying a bunch of different things before I got into RSD. I’ve toured around the US in bands, have a MS in Bacteriology, started medical school, try to stay healthy… Blah blah blah, I’ve done a lot, which has somehow weirdly gotten me to where I am today in a way where they all fit together very nicely.
Thanks for checking out the site!
Hunter
My fav post.. pretty much sums up everything
Brad Branson
Werd, that’s what you get hanging out with me for a few weeks. ;P
Lisha
Wow, Brad, you seem quite conceited, if you don’t mind my being honest. And it seems as though you are trying to make other guys more conceited. I’m just using some of your own rules to post my comment. Reading your post has improved my confidence… so I guess it’s working (even for a woman). It is good that you try to boost confidence in others. I guess most of the guys you help need more conceit because they lack self-esteem. However Good self-esteem and conceitedness are two very different things and women are highly unattracted to guys who are conceited. Self esteem = highly attractive. Humility is also attractive. My husband is VERY humble and reserved and I am way more attracted to him than a loud guy who thinks highly of himself. But that might be because I don’t need a knight in shining armor to rescue me from anything. Most women are self-empowered and don’t need a man to rescue them from anything, so women don’t have much need for an alphamale, like women used to. Just my take. I do think a lot of your tips will help a lot of people, though. So good job, Brad.
Tom
Gorilla alphaness.
Its cool to hear you talk about this because I’ve SEENNN this kind of shit but never really GOT it if that makes sense, or thought to even DESCRIBE it.
Like I’d often see dudes that I just KNOW are dominant w a girl but they’re not really SHOWING it (by DOING dominance) if that makes sense. And then I can go in listening to the “logical mind” (They’re not even touching, of course I can go in!) and she will pull back up to the guy. But I’m surprised as how easily the girls will just follow or whatever even though he’s not doing the things I feel like I need to do to get those kinds of responses.
Cool stuff.
Tom
Awesome post, it’s one I find myself coming back to again and again.
Also law 33 appears twice so there are actually 36 in total, not that I’m complaining though
Positive
Hey brad, man Tyler told about your site on his youtube video on One itis…This article and the entire site is gold when it comes to attraction and women… i have an one itis and i m gonna fk her brains out emotionally n physically later..:) i think i m in love… these stuffs are awesome… can u pls make an article Alpha male vs jerks… i think they both are the same… saw your gorilla video onyoutube…kick asss stuff bruv
Tom
Evernoted.
Brewski
Hey Brad, you are saying it all boils down to being comfortable in you own skin. Right, i get that.
But let’s say you were on the beech with a group of friends and there occasionly are females in it. What if you had a ‘permanent’ problem with you psysichal appearence. Perhaps your sternum were to stick out. How you cope with this issue and become carefree?
Brad Branson
It is only an issue because you make it one. You behave differently around women because you feel self-conscious of the “issue.” Stop focusing on it and realize that girls don’t even notice or care. When you can do that, you’ll stop projecting your insecurity.
Brewski
Way easier said than done. Any tips on not making it an “issue”? This thing is really holding me back.
Brad Branson
You gotta realize it doesn’t define you as a person. I’m sure you’ve done a lot of cool stuff in your life and have personality traits that make you a really cool guy. You read my blog…which means you are interested in improving your lifestyle. That devotion alone is something to be proud of. Focus on your positive attributes. I am constantly positively reframing everything in my life.
Brewski
Thanks dude!
Alexis Marrocco
Brad, this is an excellent article. I wonder if it’s possible to become a “gorilla” without previously being a wolf.
Do you belive it’s possible to go from Consciuous Incompetence to Unconscious Competence without anything in the middle?
Cheers from Argentina.
Brad Branson
You don’t have to previously be “the wolf.” You now know where you want to go, so that is the path to take Unconscious incompetence -> conscious incompetence -> conscious competence -> unconscious competence.
Max
Bro you need to narrow them down…
35? That’s just crazy:
Here are mine which i took from Transformations and Blueprint:
Happiness is a default state! Self-Esteem is self-sustaining!
I’m confortable in my own skin and confidently walk through the word with ease, without apology
and don’t give a fuck about what other people think of me!
I speak loud and clear! I walk tall!
i’m amusing myself and I’m a prime mover!
I’m assuming attraction and offer value!
I accept the now and take right action!
I got 10 outta 10 game because I’m the biggest pimp in the world and I’m already chosen by every
woman because I was born to satisfy them!
Brad Branson
Nice, thanks for sharing. I didn’t post 35 so they can all be memorized and applied. I know some of these will stand out more to one person than another. This way, people can focus on the ones that really stood out to them personally. I like your list though
shakthi
Do these things work for gals who are shy too? Cause ive tried sm of ur ways but nothing seems to work so greatly cause when i get kinda dominant they jus dont feel comfortable wt me
Brad Branson
Of course. There are situations where you will come across as too high value for a girl. Balance your value with comfort. She needs both of those experiences.
Bo
Hey, great post and tips but I have a major problem with it all…
I am a very charismatic person and I smile at everyone, I give everyone my attention, I make everyone feel special when I meet them. The problem with this is that I know it makes me come across to pretty girls like I am below them or like I am too into them. On the flip side, ugly girls or girls who are below me fall in love with them because I’m giving them more attention than they’ve had from someone like me in a while.
So what should I do? Do I have to change the way I am when I’m around girls I’m into or should I treat them all the same? The problem is sometimes I’ll treat a girl a certain way, who I think is a girl I’d never fu*k with, but they take it the wrong way and assume I am into them when I’m not.
Something just doesn’t seem right about me having to stop being the charismatic person I am just because having charisma makes me come across as having a lower social value. Why can’t I just not give a fuck, because I don’t? But at the same time, even though I don’t give a fuck, to some people, it comes across as if I do, or that I care too much.
I’m not sure if you’ve read How to Win Friends and Influence People but that book flies in the face of everything you and most PUA’s say… So where is the fine line? Is it just a choice you have to make?
I am really interested in this because I work hard at being everything Dale Carnegie’s book teaches us to be, but at the same time, I know that it contradicts much of what we’re supposed to do when it comes to picking up women.
Brad Branson
Hey man, yeah this is a tough question to answer in just a quick comment. Partially it probably comes down to your definition of charisma, but the goal is to not be a “pleaser” but still have fun because YOU are having fun, not to get people to respond to you in a specific way. As for the Carnegie discrepancy, the traits I mention above are HIGH VALUE traits, but that’s not the entire game, you still can be nice, you still can be friendly, but the foundation has to be through the high value mindset, if that makes sense. The other side of it is that when you have enough people vying for your attention, you don’t need to worry about making MORE friends, and that is what some of these qualities convey…
Bo
Thanks for the quick response, I know it’s not an easy answer. I have been having trouble finding that line though. It kind of sucks too because sometimes I’ll see a hot girl who I have the natural tendency to flirt with like I normally do with everyone but then I don’t because I think to myself that because she’s hot, she’ll take it the wrong way and assume I’m just interested in her.
The “pleaser” thing makes complete sense but everything that Dale Carnegie teaches is about being a pleaser; learning everyone’s name no matter how hard it might be, being a good listener, being interested, etc. All that stuff will definitely win people over, including the girls, but it will make them like you as a friend…
But I understand what you’re saying, I just can’t seem to convey it. I am confident, I know I’m the shit, and I really do think that the girl should feel honored talking to me…but just because I feel this way doesn’t mean that’s how it comes across. It’s like in one of your videos you’re pretending to be a girl who just dismissed a guy and you say something like “O man, he really was an asshole, I like him now.”
I’m not sure how interested you are in learning about/working on Dale Carnegie type things but it would be great to see you do an article about the two and how to be both without one hurting the other.
Thanks again.
Jose
LOL I loved the tony williams/tomy lee reference 
Brad Branson
Hah thanks
liam
this is great stuff, really enjoyed it, its quite interesting how some of this stuff we naturally already do,
what is the very first thing you say when approaching a woman or does this depend on her looks and environment/general vibe?
ZV
Great stuff.My problem is the verbal game (I don’t know if that’s how it’s called).I don’t feel uncomfortable touching or kissing a woman or just being around one,but I get stuck when talking.I start trying to keep the conversation or go into interview mode.
Brad Branson
Talk about what you find amusing and entertaining. My verbal game is pretty boring, but everything is being communicated with my non-verbals (i.e. perfect eye contact, close proximity, etc…)
Neil
pretty much all of the qualities listed above could be solved if you can figure out a way to get guys unstiffled or lose their inhibitions. I think the next program RSD make should be specificly on how to get unstiffled. I know this was covered at the end of the blue print and some discussions have taken place on the forums etc but they never to the guy that has trouble getting unstiffled. laters homie…
Brad Branson
This comes with time in field and learning to stop seeking external validation. When you self-amuse and have fun without relying on the environment or reactions you give yourself “permission” to be unstiffled.
Wesh
Hi Brad, thanks for this awesome post.
I’m just getting started in pick-up, coming out of a 10 year long relationship. I’ve bought some books, watched some videos, and I’d say I sport most of the traits described in the article, ie I love myself, and like to entertain myself first.
That said, I’ve been out a handful of times over the past month, and while I have no trouble opening (usually with a situational opener), I have trouble escalating and closing. It’s like I’m caught too much in having fun, and joking around, and I’m kind of at loss at how to escalate from there.
I have this girl at work that I’m chatting with regularly, but things are kept on a mostly friendly level, so I feel it’d be weird to ask her out out of the blue. I don’t know how to break that, since I haven’t approached her with a clear intent from the start. Any advice? Thanks
About Brad
Brad Branson has been an international dating coach with the leading dating company Real Social Dynamics for 3 years.
Through his own success and teaching experience, he has taught HUNDREDS of men how to create the dating life they desire.
He’s coached in over 35 countries on 4 continents, developing universal patterns that ANYONE can apply, no matter what city, age or income bracket they come from.
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Am very much interested in the application what you’ve just described here. Can you recommend something. One little shift in my behaviour or something that can bring me closer to our goal here. Ie communicating higher value.